Dan Talks to the Sea Lion
OK, here is my conversation with the sea lion from yesterday when I went temporarily insane.D = Dan
S = Sea Lion
S: Bwaarf!
D: What?
S: I said Bwaarf!
D: Oh! I couldn´t understand your thick Argentine accent! Bwaarf!
S: Good thanks. Where are you from?
D: The U.S. I´m here studying Spanish.
S: In Ushuaia?
D: Well, I was studying in Buenos Aires for a few weeks, and then had wanted to go to Mendoza, but I had an interview for business school so I had to cancel my Mendoza trip. Then the Aerolineas strike happened and the only tickets I could get to come down to Ushuaia were for 12 days.
S: Bwaarf!
D: I know! But I´m leaving in two days.
S: Didn´t you get bored shitless here?
D: Well, sort of, but its still very pretty. Don´t you get bored? You just sit on a rock in the middle of the Beagle Channel all day.
S: True, but the time flies. Also we just finished our annual Bwaarf season, which meant I had to fight for a week, followed by a long period of Bwaarfing all day and night. Now I´m tired.
D: Uhhhh...ok. Do you ever swim to the mainland?
S: Nah, you humans are a buncha dicks. Plus the bars in Ushuaia suck.
D: True, and true. But what do you do for fun then?
S: I like to lie on this rock, and sometimes I swim and catch fish. I also like to shit.
D: Sounds a lot like my life, except you swim and fish.
S: Yeah, we also have contests like "Who can Bwaarf louder?" and "Who has a bigger belly?"
D: Do you win?
S: Yeah, my gut is friggen huge. I nearly crushed Gladys when we Bwaarf."
D: Is that your mate?
S: Yeah, she´s my bitch.
D: I thought bitches were female dogs, not female sea lions.
S: They are, but I just like to call her my bitch, escpeially when we Bwaarf. She calls me "big papa".
D: Uh....yeah. I think that was more than I needed to know right now. So any big plans for tonight?
S: Nah, probably just lie on the rock. I think there might be a new episode of Lost on tonight too. Yourself?
D: Well, I have a bit of a cold, so probably gonna just try to get some extra sleep.
S: Drink some orange juice and maybe try some tea with ginseng.
D: Thanks, I´ll remember that. Anyway, the boat seems to be moving away from your tiny island now, so I guess I´ll catch you later.
S: Bwaarf!
